Jokes

[Bernard Woolley]

No mouse had its gender transitioned, though.

[Pdf27]

[Bernard Woolley]

From Private Eye.

[Craiglxviii]

Stealing that!!

[Pdf27]

IMG_0267.jpeg

[jemhouston]

[Paul Nuttall]

[Craiglxviii]

IMG_4357.jpeg

[jemhouston]

[M.Becker]

[jemhouston]

Funny.

[Bernard Woolley]

Doesn’t that joke date back to at least the Reagan Administration?

[Nightwatch2]

Doesn’t that joke date back to at least the Reagan Administration?

At least

[Poohbah]

If you know, you know:

FM PREFECT JUDEA JERUSALEM
TO CAESAR TIBERIUS ROME
INFO KING HEROD JUDEA JERUSALEM
SUBJ//OPREP-IIIB BEELINE//
RMKS//I. SUSPECTED INSURRECTIONIST JESUS OF NAZARETH, REPORTED TO BE OF THE HOUSE AND LINE OF DAVID, EXECUTED BY CRUCIFIXION THIS FRIDAY IMMEDIATELY PAST. ACTION WAS NECESSARY TO MAINTAIN PUBLIC ORDER.
II. DUE TO POTENTIAL FOR POLITICAL UNREST, A GUARD WAS PLACED ON THE TOMB. PER REPORT OF GUARDS ON WATCH, THE TOMB SPONTANEOUSLY OPENED SHORTLY BEFORE DAWN TODAY, ACCOMPANIED BY BLINDING LIGHT. BODY OF JESUS WAS NOT RPT NOT PRESENT. GUARDS PRESENTLY BEING HELD IN PRETRIAL CONFINEMENT PENDING COURT-MARTIAL PROCEEDINGS.
III. INDIGENOUS PERSONNEL HAVE SPREAD RUMORS THAT JESUS OF NAZARETH HAS RISEN FROM THE DEAD.
IV. URGENTLY REQUEST GUIDANCE. MY POLAD IS F***ING USELESS (HIRING SENATORS' IDIOT NEPHEWS IS NOT A VALID STRATEGY OUT HERE), KING HEROD IS A SCHEMING OPPORTUNISTIC WEASELLY LITTLE S**T, AND THE LOCAL RELIGIOUS AUTHORITIES HAVE GONE NUCKING FUTS.
V. STANDING BY FOR DIRECTION. I REMAIN YOUR MOST OBEDIENT SERVANT. PONTIUS PILATUS SENDS SPQR.//

BT




NNNN

[jemhouston]

You know Poohbah, posts like that are why I no longer drink or have a tumbler in my hand when I read posts.

[kdahm]

FM CAESAR TIBERIUS ROME
TO PREFECT JUDEA JERUSALEM
SUBJ//OPREP-IIIB BEELINE//
RMKS//TURKEY TROTS TO WATER WHERE RPT WHERE IS JESUS OF NAZARETH THE WORLD WONDERS

BT


NNNN

[jemhouston]

FM CAESAR TIBERIUS ROME
TO PREFECT JUDEA JERUSALEM
SUBJ//OPREP-IIIB BEELINE//
RMKS//TURKEY TROTS TO WATER WHERE RPT WHERE IS JESUS OF NAZARETH THE WORLD WONDERS

BT


NNNN

[Poohbah]

FM CAESAR TIBERIUS ROME
TO PREFECT JUDEA JERUSALEM
SUBJ//OPREP-IIIB BEELINE//
RMKS//TURKEY TROTS TO WATER WHERE RPT WHERE IS JESUS OF NAZARETH THE WORLD WONDERS

BT


NNNN

Stolen

[David Newton]

Just seen a truly terrible joke on the side of a pest control van.

What note sounds when a wasp hits a car windscreen?

Bee flat!