Jokes

Slide along a cold one, kick back and relax. Share amusing stories, anything on your mind, unwind amongst friends.
User avatar
M.Becker
Posts: 3087
Joined: Fri Nov 18, 2022 7:13 pm

Re: Jokes

Post by M.Becker »

Actuall event at Wal-Mart.

That’s so twisted… 🤪🤣
MC3 Murder Creek Cattle Co. · Folgen
Gestern um 05:35
·
Waycross Woman Arrested After Turning Numbered Pigs Loose in Walmart
WAYCROSS, GA — Shoppers at the Waycross Walmart were thrown into confusion Saturday afternoon after a local woman allegedly released four pigs—each spray‑painted with the numbers 1, 2, 3, and 5—into the store, triggering what authorities later described as “a logistical nightmare disguised as a math problem.”
🐖 The Incident
According to witnesses, 47‑year‑old Charlene Mixon entered the store pushing a buggy that appeared to be shaking and occasionally grunting. Employees assumed it was either a wobbly wheel or a normal Saturday.
Moments later, Mixon allegedly opened the buggy, shouted “Run free!”, and four pigs scattered across the store—one toward Housewares, one toward Grocery, one toward Electronics, and one directly into the Vision Center.
🧮 The Numbering Scheme
The pigs were labeled 1, 2, 3, and 5, which immediately caused confusion among staff.
> “We spent half an hour looking for pig number 4,” said assistant manager Trevor Haskins. “Then we realized there wasn’t one. I’m still mad about it.”
Several customers joined the search, believing it was some kind of promotional event.
🚓 Police Response
Waycross Police arrived quickly, though officers admitted they were “not trained for livestock deployed with psychological warfare.”
One officer slipped near the bacon section, which he later described as “deeply ironic.”
All four pigs were eventually captured using:
- Two laundry baskets
- A pallet of marshmallows
- And one determined elderly greeter who said she had “handled worse at the Piggly Wiggly years ago”
Mixon was arrested without incident, though she did request that officers “let the pigs finish what they started.”
📝 Charges
Authorities say she faces:
- Disorderly conduct
- Livestock at large
- Interference with commerce
- And “creating unnecessary suspense via missing number 4”
The pigs were unharmed and transported to the Ware County Animal Control facility, where staff described them as “friendly and surprisingly fast.”
🗣 Community Reaction
Locals have already dubbed the event “The Great Walmart Pig Caper.”
Poohbah
Posts: 3486
Joined: Thu Nov 17, 2022 2:08 pm
Location: San Diego, CA

Re: Jokes

Post by Poohbah »

M.Becker wrote: Fri Mar 20, 2026 7:39 pm Actuall event at Wal-Mart.

That’s so twisted… 🤪🤣
MC3 Murder Creek Cattle Co. · Folgen
Gestern um 05:35
·
Waycross Woman Arrested After Turning Numbered Pigs Loose in Walmart
WAYCROSS, GA — Shoppers at the Waycross Walmart were thrown into confusion Saturday afternoon after a local woman allegedly released four pigs—each spray‑painted with the numbers 1, 2, 3, and 5—into the store, triggering what authorities later described as “a logistical nightmare disguised as a math problem.”
🐖 The Incident
According to witnesses, 47‑year‑old Charlene Mixon entered the store pushing a buggy that appeared to be shaking and occasionally grunting. Employees assumed it was either a wobbly wheel or a normal Saturday.
Moments later, Mixon allegedly opened the buggy, shouted “Run free!”, and four pigs scattered across the store—one toward Housewares, one toward Grocery, one toward Electronics, and one directly into the Vision Center.
🧮 The Numbering Scheme
The pigs were labeled 1, 2, 3, and 5, which immediately caused confusion among staff.
> “We spent half an hour looking for pig number 4,” said assistant manager Trevor Haskins. “Then we realized there wasn’t one. I’m still mad about it.”
Several customers joined the search, believing it was some kind of promotional event.
🚓 Police Response
Waycross Police arrived quickly, though officers admitted they were “not trained for livestock deployed with psychological warfare.”
One officer slipped near the bacon section, which he later described as “deeply ironic.”
All four pigs were eventually captured using:
- Two laundry baskets
- A pallet of marshmallows
- And one determined elderly greeter who said she had “handled worse at the Piggly Wiggly years ago”
Mixon was arrested without incident, though she did request that officers “let the pigs finish what they started.”
📝 Charges
Authorities say she faces:
- Disorderly conduct
- Livestock at large
- Interference with commerce
- And “creating unnecessary suspense via missing number 4”
The pigs were unharmed and transported to the Ware County Animal Control facility, where staff described them as “friendly and surprisingly fast.”
🗣 Community Reaction
Locals have already dubbed the event “The Great Walmart Pig Caper.”
The skipped number is pure artistry.
Belushi TD
Posts: 1698
Joined: Thu Nov 17, 2022 11:20 am

Re: Jokes

Post by Belushi TD »

I question the illegality of skipping #4.

Of course, we've been reading similar variations of this story for 20+ years on the internet. The best part is that its still funny!!!!

Belushi TD
Nik_SpeakerToCats
Posts: 2233
Joined: Sat Dec 10, 2022 10:56 am

Re: Jokes

Post by Nik_SpeakerToCats »

So, I'd ordered yet-another two four-packs of 'Useful' lidded 24-litre storage tubs from Amazon.

Usually, they arrive four to a carton, but always minus tracking data. So, courier delivery is a bit 'lucky dip'...

Arrived home from weekly shop at local 'Budget Mall' to find front yard's wheelie bin parade deranged.

Yes, the tubs had been delivered sooner than expected.

And, all eight (8) were neatly stacked behind the re-arranged bins like so many 'giant Lego' blocks...

Upside, nice to know that courier has a 'Good Sense of Humour'...

And, for a change, the weather was clement rather than raining side-ways yet-again, yet-again...
If you cannot see the wood for the trees, deploy LIDAR.
Post Reply